Top Groucho Comments

10. From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it.
9. A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
8. I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
7. I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
6. I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.
5. She got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
4. I didn’t like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions – the curtain was up.
3. I don’t care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
2. Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
1. Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.